The Neighbourhood Snitch

It seems as if I have become the neighborhood snitch. I keep relaying information to the leasing office about things that I feel like are of interest to them and would improve life for us and just feel like it is the right thing to do. Not to even mention the times I have called the police for fear someone might get hurt.

This comes from an innate desire to do the right thing no matter what others think. I never regret doing something just how I did it. This leads me to call the police when a neighbor is having a loud argument I fear might turn physical. I failed to do it on two occasions in the past and regretted it. I pick up worms out of puddles so they don't drown. I report to the leasing office when someone is tossing bottles in to our little forested area, I worry about them breaking and the kids and animals getting hurt. I told them I saw a prostitute being picked up in the complex. I lived next door to a brothel before and will not put up with it.

Sometimes I wonder if I am just being a busy body. I told the office a few weeks ago that a little boy had broken a small window with a rock. His mother did not care so she was not going to tell them. Was that busy bodying? I guess it was. Still, I did nothing I would not do for myself. Had my son broken the window, I would have told them and made arrangements to pay for it. It is only fair. I think I have not crossed the like but I am getting very close to being that little kid who tattles on other kids about stuff they were not even involved in, or perhaps I have crossed the line.

I am thinking more carefully about how I go about doing what I perceive to be the right thing. I have hurt people and caused things to happen that should not have. I have let other people bully me into doing things I should not have.

When I was in college some evil fire and brimstone street preachers came to OU. They called every passing student a whore or a whore monger and said all homosexuals were evil and an abomination in the site of God. I thought they were terribly hateful and offensive. Someone stole a briefcase and a sign just out of spite. Not that they did not deserve it. They were horrible. I still did not think that was right. Vigilante justice and giving other people punishments we think they deserve just is not right. I saw that some of my dorm mates had stolen the sign, not the briefcase but the sign. I went and told the preachers I knew where their sign was and would get it back for them. I was going to go and talk to the boy who had stolen it and ask him to give it to me so I could return it. That was the plan but unfortunately I was still a little girl and much more manipulatable and intimidatable by authority figures. He bullied me into telling him where the sign was. I did not tell him who had it. I sent this horrible mean person to bully and yell at my neighbours. I was filled with guilt and shame. I had allowed him to intimidate me into doing a wrong in my quest to do what I perceived was the right thing. I was too ashamed to look at my dorm mate (he was coincidentally gay) who had taken the poster in the eye again. I avoided him and probably made everything worse. I was just so ashamed of myself.

I am always afraid of doing this but I do not let that stop me. I try to do the right thing no matter what but I am always conscious of how I should do it. What would be the right way. For example, when my neighbours smoke weed in their bathroom it is as if they smoke it in ours, there is an insulation problem between the two bathrooms. If they do it again I will not go to the police or the office or anything that tately, I will tape a sealed envelope on their door respectfully explaining that I really do not care if they smoke weed in their bathroom but I do care when it smells like they are smoking it in our bathroom. I will ask them respectfully to refrain from this and if they can I can refrain from telling anyone about it.

I guess all this ultimately stems from my poor social skills and belief in rules. Sure some rules are wrong and need to be changed but unless a rule is outright immoral, not just flawed, it should be followed until it is changed through the proper channels. Otherwise society would slide into chaos and we would screw each other over so much that we would lose our humanity. I do not believe in anarchy.

self-defence

I like to think I know a bit about self-defence. Not only how to do it but also the pros and cons of different strategies. I have taken a little over three years of martial arts as well as several self-defence classes and read much about the subject. Am I an expert? No, not at all, there are many people who know much more about the subject than I do. I merely know enough to discuss the issue, not pretending to be an authority.

One thing one can never go wrong on in regards to self-defence is preparation. Preventing the occurrence of an attack and not putting one self in danger. Not going down dark alleys and the like. Going places in pairs. If you walk or run a lot after dark like me take well lit routes with sidewalks and some traffic. Also being aware of your surroundings and not letting your guard down just because you are somewhere familiar like your drive way.

Then after that comes choices that are less clear. If all you do to prevent fails how will you defend yourself. If you are an American, you may say carrying a gun is a good choice and it can be but there are some risks and short comings to consider. Guns are not fool proof and can be taken away and used against you. I could do it, but that may not be a good decision. Unless you are really willing to shoot when you pull it out and have practiced it can be dangerous to you and innocent by standers. If your attacker is really close to you you could actually shoot yourself, trust me it can happen that is why you should always practice. If you shoot and fail to hit you can shoot someone else. If you are not well practiced and perfectly willing to pull the trigger it may not work either in case someone decides to call your bluff. Guns can be just as dangerous to you as to someone else if they are off your person. If you are the type of person to keep one in your house an attacker can find it and use it on you. I just heard a story of a woman who kept a gun under her pillow. She got up in the morning and got in the shower. She thought she heard a noise outside and looked out the window, saw nothing and thought nothing of it. When she got out she was greeted by a man holding her gun who then raped her.

So, the next most common choice is pepper spray which can also be a good choice, provided you know how to use it. The main draw back with pepper spray, other than that it can be taken away from you like a gun except you may have much less moral qualms about using, it is that it is impossible to use with out it contaminating the sprayer. If your attacker fights it and continues the attack are you going to be in good enough shape to fight back and maybe run? I know how it feels, I have sprayed pepper spray before under very controlled circumstances and it felt pretty lousy and I had to run out of the room. Let's not discuss why I did it, it was just curiosity.

Now, tazers are all the rage. They are used by law enforcement and are very effective at temporarily immobilizing and bringing a person down. A tazer over loads the nervous system and prevents your brain from telling your muscles what to do. It is hard to fight but a determined person can pull the hooks out and after the hooks are out you can not refire. Then you have to have a plan b. Let us not forget that a tazer just like the first two choices can be taken away and used against you.

Then there is a myriad of other weapon options which you need to practice with if you choose to use. Weather or no you choose to use a weapon you should still learn to defend yourself physicall. Your skill at weaponless self-defence cannot be taken away or used against you. I can not recommend enough going to a self-defence class. Everyone has the right to fight to defend themselves when attacked. Self-defence skills are not for beating someone in a bar brawl over a guy insulting your significant other or mother or your man/womanhood. Which is one of the reasons I will not discuss the specific techniques here because the most effective moves can kill and mame a person even when done by a child on an adult. The other reason is that they are completely useless if they are not practiced and in muscle memory. Just knowing a technique you have never practiced is no good. Go to a self defence class. Don't be scared of looking stupid. I used to but that did not stop me. I still look stupid in class most of the time but I am okay with it. If you don't know where and when and how much contact your local police through their information number, not 911. Or a martial arts school. Don't be afraid to be safe.